When there is no soul-searching, is the soul still there?
from The Sacredness of Questioning Everything by David Dark

We'll build new traditions in place of the old
'Cause life without revision will silence our souls
from "Snow" by Sleeping at Last

Monday, June 11, 2012

John 15: Have I been with Christ since the beginning?

1 I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit. 3 You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken in you. 4 Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. 5 I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in Me, he is thrown away as a branch and dries up; and they gather them, and cast them into the fire and they are burned. 7 If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples. 9 Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. 10 If you keep my commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father's commandments and abide in His love. 11 These things I have spoken to you so that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full. 12 This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are My friends if you do what I command you. 15 No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I have heard from My Father, I have made known to you. 16 You did not choose Me but I chose you, and appointed you that you would go and bear fruit, and that your fruit would remain, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name He may give to you. 17 This I command you, that you love one another. 18 If the world hates you, you know that it has hated Me before it hated you. 19 If you were of the world, the world would love you its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, because of this the world hates you. 20 Remember the word that I said to you, "A slave is not greater than his master." If they persecute Me, they will also persecute you; if they kept My word, they will keep yours also. 21 But all these things they will do to you for My name's sake, because they do not know the One who sent Me. 22 If I had not come and spoken to them, they would not have sin, but now they have no excuse for their sin. 23 He who hates Me hates My Father also. 24 If I had not done among them the words which no one else did, they would not have sin; but now they have both seen and hated Me and My Father as well. 25 But they have done this to fulfill the word that is written in the Law, "They hated Me without a cause." 26 When the Helper comes, whom I will send to you from the Father, that is the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, He will testify about Me, 27 and you will testify also because you have been with Me from the beginning.


Musings, Mysteries, and Words that Make Me Full of Awe in John 15


vs. 1-3
You are already clean. I am already clean. Why? What have I done to be clean? Have I repented? Have I said a prayer? Have I dropped my nets and followed? Have I been baptized? What has made me already clean? It is astounding enough to be told by Christ that I am clean and  more amazing still to know how-- "because of the word which I have spoken in you." I hardly know what that means, but I know this-- it's something that Christ did and nothing of my own. Astounding, freeing, amazing. 


vs. 4-5
 Apart from Christ I can do nothing. I cannot be reminded that enough. I should have it tattooed on my hands. 


vs. 6-7
"If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you." Interesting... Verses that make it sound like you can ask for things like Jesus is a genie are interesting. I don't know what they mean. What is abiding in Christ, how do His words abide in me, and what else could I have to wish for if I understood that and knew it to be true?


vs. 8-9
These verses show a lot of the interconnectedness of God the Father and Christ and then also connect to the Holy Spirit at the end. It's neat to read, trying to forget what you learned as kid in church about the Holy Trinity and being amazed by it instead of thinking it's normal because it shouldn't seem unmysterious, trying to see what Jesus Himself said about the relationship that exists between Them. 


vs. 10-13
How to abide in the love of Jesus? Keep His commandments. What are His commandments? Love. Love as He has loved, a love that lays down life for friends. 


vs. 14-15 
Friends vs. Slaves-- Jesus says He no longer calls us slaves. I wonder what that implies about a time when He did? Also, just like I don't understand the promise in verse 7 that says we can ask for whatever we wish, I also don't understand why, if Jesus has made all things known to us that His Father has made known to him, there is so much I don't understand? 


vs. 16
Again, a genie verse, but before that, more fruit, and get this-- I did not choose Him, but He chose me and appointed me to bear fruit. WOW.  I did not choose Him, but He chose me. I often feel-- and I'm not trying to get too predestination-ey here-- but I often feel that we in the contemporary church place too much emphasis on what WE do, our personal choices, our individual decisions, our asking and accepting. Perhaps it's growing up in a Christian denomination devoid of phrases like "personal decision for Christ" and "accept Jesus as Lord," but there's always been something about phrases like that that makes me feel like it's too much about me. Only by His grace-- not any fallible will, emotion, or intellect of mine-- could I even be made to accept Him. He chose me. Awesome.


vs. 17
It bears repeating: The command is to love one another.  


vs.18-25
This big chunk of text is interesting in so many ways. It's interesting as a follow-up right after the vine and branches, a commandment of love, and joy being made full. It's also interesting when I consider the idea of being persecuted for Christ. Despite what others may feel, I find it hard to consider anything that can happen to us in America as real persecution; we're in a land of too much freedom to be really inhibited or harmed. And, honestly, it seems to me that most of the hatred aimed at us in this country has a lot less to do with Jesus and not having an excuse for sin than it has to do with how obvious our sin is and how unable we are to admit and own it. Yes, I believe even in the face of perfection, people do and will hate Jesus because of resentment of the sin He reveals. There is part of me that thinks at first, "How could anyone hate a man of love like Jesus," but then a bigger part of me knows that I have felt that hate before, frustration at not being good enough and not understanding enough, anger at having to be grateful for grace when I didn't have the ability to perfect to begin with, bitterness that God would have chosen such a hateful (so it seems to a human mind) way to bring me to His love... I get why someone could hate Jesus, at least until He intervenes and replaces the hate with love instead, but, honestly-- sorry, brothers and sisters, I'm part of this too-- I don't think most people get to the point where they have to grapple with hating Jesus so they can get past that to hating their sin instead and get past that to love. I think, because of us and the way we parade our rightness in everyone's faces all the time instead of being Christ, most people go on forever very justifiably hating us and our sins and our hypocrisy and never getting to Christ. It makes me want to shout and have all Christians join me in chorus: "Yes, we are sinners! Yes, we are hypocrites! We admit it, and we're not going to try to convince you that we're not! We own it. We are hypocrites! Only Jesus isn't. Can we please talk about Him now and not about us?" Think about it really. How much do we actually point to Christ and talk about and glorify Him and how much do we justify ourselves and preach our messages and talk about the kind of life we're called to instead of talking about the One who calls us?


vs. 26
1. I need to learn more about this Helper!
2. "and you will testify also, because you have been with Me from the beginning." I have been with Christ from the beginning? Wait, back up. In the whole process of reading and writing this, I haven't even looked to see to whom Jesus was addressing this message. I've been assuming that it extends to me and to all Christians, and I think it does, but just to add some perspective, this chapter is part of a lengthy answer to this question from Judas (not Iscariot): "Lord, what then has happened that You are going to disclose Yourself to us and not to the world?"  which was an offshoot from Jesus's answer to this comment from Philip: "Lord, show us the Father, and it is enough for us," which was a response to the famous "I am the way and the truth and the life," which was an answer to this question from Thomas: "Lord, we do not know where You are going, how do we know the way?" I could keep going back and unraveling this conversation, and indeed I will go back and read it more myself when I finish typing this, but WOW. This is all part of the last conversation during the last supper, after Judas Iscariot had left the room and before they left for the garden. What an amazing chance to talk to Jesus, what amazing questions, and what amazing yet enigmatic answers. There is so much packed in these chapters, but I only know the memory verses from them without the context. And I am missing things so astounding as "you have been with Me since the beginning." That is amazing. I'm like Thomas always asking, "How do we know the way?" always looking for the right path, and I don't think that I'll find a road map even in Jesus's direct answer to that question, but I do know this: Jesus is the way.

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