Remind Me Who I Am

When I lose my way
And I forget my name
Remind me who I am
In the mirror all I see
Is who I don’t want to be
Remind me who I am
In the loneliest places
When I can’t remember what grace is
Tell me once again
Who I am to you, who I am to you
Tell me lest I forget
Who I am to you, that I belong to you
When my heart is like a stone
And I’m running far from home
Remind me who I am
When I can’t receive your love
Afraid I’ll never be enough
Remind me who I am
If I’m your beloved
Can you help me believe it?
I’m the one you love
I’m the one you love
And that will be enough
I’m the one you love


by Jason Gray and Jason Ingram

Why (besides running late, which isn't an excuse because I could have made it) I Am Not in Sunday School Right Now

There's something I need to confess
At the risk of exposing my faults
But I'm starting to find that most of the time
I just don't like people at all
When I saw you five minutes ago
I was afraid you might talk off my ear
I panicked inside and decided to hide
And that's how I ended up here
Crouching behind the live lobster tank
Hoping you'd just pass me by, oh...
That's how I ended up here
That's how I ended up here
Oh how I wish I could say
It's my first time to hide in this spot
But with all of the people I try to avoid
I find myself down here a lot
I mean, just look at these guys in the tank
With the red rubber bands 'round their arms
If they don't open up 
And just keep to themselves
They won't do anyone harm
So I screen my calls,
don't answer the door
Sometimes wish I could disappear,
oh...That's how I ended up here
That's how I ended up ..
Building a wall so no one could bother me
Living my life in isolation
Opening up to only those close to me
Nobody's close to me, what have I done?
See, I really want to be known
But I'm not quite as strong as the fear
That you won't understand the fool that I am
And that's how I ended up here
That's how I ended up here
That's how I ended up here


"How I Ended Up Here" by Jason  Gray and Andy Gullahorn

Without Running Away by Jason Gray

I’ve spent some days looking 

For a length of rope 

And a place to hang it 

From the end of my hope 

But where I thought hope had ended 

I always find a little bit more 

It’s not like I’m trying 

To be optimistic 

If the truth be told 

I’d rather dismiss it 

And be free of the burden 

Of the living that hoping requires 

To bring my heart 

To every day 

And to run the risk of fearlessly loving 

WITHOUT RUNNING AWAY

Jesus is speaking 

But it’s so hard to hear 

When disciples with swords 

Are cutting off ears 

Broken and bleeding I’m waiting for healing to come 

But wounded is a part 

I’ve learned to play well 

Though the wound may run deeper 

Than I know how to tell 

Where pain’s an addiction 

That keeps me buried alive 

But when it’s all that I know

 I’m afraid to leave it behind 

To bring my heart 

To every day 

And to run the risk of fearlessly loving 

WITHOUT RUNNING AWAY

My heart is not lifted up 

My eyes are not lifted up 

But calm and quiet is my soul 

Like a child with its mother is my soul 

After awhile in the dark

Your eyes will adjust 

In the shadows you’ll find 

The hand you can trust 

And the still small voice

 That calls like the rising sun 

Come 

Bring your heart 

To every day 

And to run the risk of fearlessly loving 

WITHOUT RUNNING AWAY 

You must run the risk of fearlessly loving 

WITHOUT RUNNING AWAY

Consume Me

From The Inside Out
Hillsong United
A thousand times I've failed
Still Your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
Still I'm caught in Your grace

Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame

My heart and my soul, I give You control
Consume me from the inside out, Lord
Let justice and praise become my embrace
To love You from the inside out

Your will above all else
My purpose remains
The art of losing myself
In bringing You praise

Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame

And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord, my soul cries out

From the inside out
Lord, my soul cries out
From the inside out
Lord, my soul cries out

In You

When my heart is growing weary,
I will come to You.
And when my joy has been forsaken,
I will come to You.


My soul is longing to find Your peace.
Lord, I just need to rest...


...in You.
Every heart can find it's healing
In You.
Every life is given meaning,
Our hope is found, and love abounds 
In You.


When the weight of my sin is on me,
I will come to You.
And when my spirit has been defeated, 
I will come to You.


Though I'm covered in guilt and shame,
Your grace comes alive...

....in You.

Every heart can find it's healing

In You.

Every life is given meaning,

Our hope is found, and love abounds 

In You.

Oh, my heart rejoices
When I hear You say
Yes, my heart rejoices
When I hear You say...


"Come all you who are heavy laden,
And I will give you rest.
Come all you who are heavy laden,
And I will give you rest.

Come all you who are heavy laden,

And I will give you rest.

Come all you who are heavy laden,

And I will give you rest."

...in You.

Every heart can find it's healing

In You.

Every life is given meaning,

Our hope is found, and love abounds 

In You.

Every heart can find it's healing

In You.

Every life is given meaning,

Our hope is found, and love abounds 

In You.

Our hope is found, and love abounds 

In You.

-- "In You" by Dave Hunt

Musical Supplement to the Parable of Two Lost Sons

There are two sides to every person
Like the two sides of a dime
Heads or tails it depends upon
Who's watching at the time
Though I hate to say it
Mine is no exception
One part is the prodigal
The other part: deception
Like the prince and the pauper
Like Jacob and his brother
Each hide a different heart
Each a shadow of the other
Me and my doppelganger
Both share the same blood
One I have hated
The other have I loved
One of them's the Golden Boy
The man I'd like to be I show him off in the parades
For all the world to see
The other is much weaker
He stumbles all the time
The source of my embarrassment
He's the one I try to hide
The Golden boy is made of straw
His finest suit will surely burn
His vice is the virtue
That he never had to earn
The prodigal's been broken
And emptied at the wishing well
But he's stronger for the breaking
With a story to tell
I'm not easy with confessions
It's hard to tell the truth
But I have favored the golden boy
While the other I've abused
And he takes it like a man
Though he's longing like a child
To be loved and forgiven
And share the burden for awhile
So take a good look in the mirror
Tell me who you see
The one who Jesus died for
Or the one you'd rather be
Can you find it in your heart
To show mercy to the one
The Father loved so much
That he gave his only son...


--"The Golden Boy & The Prodigal" by Jason Gray

I Will Arise and Go To Jesus!

Come, Ye Sinners (adapted from the words of Joseph Hart, 1759)

I will arise and go to Jesus,

He will embrace me in His arms;

In the arms of my dear Savior,

Oh, there are ten thousand charms.

Come, ye sinners, poor and wretched,
Weak and wounded, sick and sore;
Jesus, ready, stands to save you,
Full of pity, joined with power.
He is able, He is able;
He is willing; doubt no more.

Come ye needy, come, and welcome,
God's free bounty glorify;
True belief and true repentance,
Every grace that brings you nigh.
Without money, without money
Come to Jesus Christ and buy.

Come, ye weary, heavy laden,
Bruised and broken by the fall;
If you tarry 'til you're better,
You will never come at all.
Not the righteous, not the righteous;
Sinners Jesus came to call.

Let not conscience make you linger,
Nor of fitness fondly dream;
All the fitness He requires
Is to feel your need of Him.
This He gives you, this He gives you,
'Tis the Spirit's rising beam.

Lo! The Incarnate God, ascended;
Pleads the merit of His blood.
Venture on Him; venture wholly,
Let no other trust intrude.
None but Jesus, none but Jesus
Can do helpless sinners good.

Hello World

Traffic crawls, cell phone calls
Talk radio screams at me.
Through my tinted window I see
A little girl, rust red minivan.
She's got chocolate on her face
Got little hands, and she waves at me.

Yeah, she smiles at me.

Hello, world.

How've you been?

Good to see you, my old friend.

Sometimes I feel cold as steel.

Broken like I'm never gonna heal.

I see a light, a little hope.

In a little girl.

Hello, world.
Every day I drive by

A little white church.
It's got these little white crosses
Like angels in the yard.
Maybe I should stop on in,
Say a prayer,
Maybe talk to God

Like He is there.

Oh, I know He's there.

Yeah, I know He's there.

Hello, world.

How've you been?

Good to see you, my old friend.

Sometimes I feel as cold as steel.

And broken like I'm never going to heal.

I see a light,

A little grace, a little faith unfurled.

Hello, world.

Sometimes I forget what living's for

And I heave my life through my front door.

And I'll be there.

Oh, I'm home again.

I see my wife, little boy, little girl

Hello, world.

Hello, world.

All the empty disappears.

I remember why I'm here.

Just surrender and believe.

I fall down on my knees.

Oh, hello world.

Hello, world.

Hello, world.

--"Hello World" performed by Lady Antebellum

The words of this song are beautiful, and the music that accompanies them tells the story even better than the lyrics do.  The entire song sounds like worship... I don't really know how to define that, but it does.  Listening to the album today, the song caught my attention simply with its sound.  The strokes of the piano keys, the soft building base notes swelling underneath, a high and haunting piano melody breaking through just like the hope breaking through in the lyrics, drums building, strings joining and orchestration soaring, piano breaking freer and freer like the heart emerging, steel softening...

One of the things that makes me believe in God... (I've been trying to work out and articulate my reasons, and, while I'd like to have more than "feelings" to support my rationale, I'll go with only my emotion and my smattering of academic dabbling for now.)  ...One of the things that makes me believe in God is the ability of humans to reach each other with words, with music, with art, with dance.  What is it inside us that needs to create, that is moved by the creations of others?  Can this be a bit of God?  A glimpse of a Creator who glories in creation?  Is it blasphemy to say that my recent encounter with this song by a secular country music group that also sings about one night stands and heartbreak felt to me like an encounter with God?  Or are instances when we are moved by interactions with other humans-- like the moment with the little girl in the song-- truly glimpses of the divine in the form of connection between one creation and another.  Could such moments sear as they do because they are a communion of creations of the same artist?   Much has been written and sung about the oneness of humanity, about the common bonds that transcend cultural differences, and about a brotherhood that should exist. I love these ideals in the earthly realm, and I realize I hold to them from a spiritual standpoint as well.  What connects us if there is nothing greater than man?  What is a laugh or a tear?  What can explain the feelings they express that all nations can understand if there is not something greater than the individual and the groups and governments he creates?  There must be something more, and I call it God.

Listening to this song, opening my eyes a little wider to see the world and say "hello" to it in a way that I haven't in a while, I feel the meaning of the words reverberating through me-- I know He's there.  I know He's there.

As the building rejoicing of the music pulses through me, I wonder what this can be besides worship.  Why does humanity have the impulse to create beauty if not created by something beautiful, why if not for worship?  


Perhaps even our most irreligious productions come from the same place that produces praise.  Maybe even our darkest desires originate from the same core that yearns for God.  It seems to me now that it could not be possible for us to have art or appreciation for it in any way if not for a little bit of divinity, a little breath of God that must exist inside of all of us.

Note: You can and should go listen to the song on Lady Antebellum's website.  Just click the link and then the play button beside the song "Hello World."

The Beauty of Grace Is that It Makes Life Unfair

I’ve given up on giving up slowly, I’m blending in so
You won’t even know me apart from 
this whole world that shares my fate
This one last bullet you mention 
is my one last shot at redemption
because I know to live you must give your life away
And I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and
I’ve been locked inside that house 
all the while You hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out 
and that might be the death of me
And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, 
promise I’m going because
I gotta get outta here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
I gotta get outta here
And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, 
I’m begging You to be my escape.
I’m giving up on doing this alone now
Cause I’ve failed and I’m ready to be shown how
He’s told me the way and I’m trying to get there
And this life sentence that I’m serving
I admit that I’m every bit deserving
But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair
I am a hostage to my own humanity
Self detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made
And all I’m asking is for 
You to do what You can with me
But I can’t ask You to give what You already gave
I fought You for so long
I should have let You in
Oh how we regret those things we do
And all I was trying to do was save my own skin
But so were You
So were You 
-- "Be My Escape" performed by Relient K

Harlots Bought as Brides

If you could love me as a wife and for my wedding gift, your life Should that be all I'd ever need or is there more I'm looking for and should I read between the lines and look for blessings in disguise To make me handsome, rich, and wise Is that really what you want? I am a whore I do confess, But I put you on just like a wedding dress and I run down the aisle and I run down the aisle. I'm a prodigal with no way home, but I put you on just like a ring of gold, and I run down the aisle to you. So could you love this bastard child Though I don't trust you to provide With one hand in a pot of gold and with the other in your side? I am so easily satisfied by the call of lovers so less wild That I would take a little cash Over your very flesh and blood. Because money cannot buy a husband's jealous eye When you have knowingly deceived his wife. --"Wedding Dress" by Derek Webb When the Lord first spoke through Hosea, the Lord said to Hosea, "Go, take to yourself a wife of harlotry and have children of harlotry; for the land commits flagrant harlotry, forsaking the Lord." (Hosea 1:2) For their mother has played the harlot; She who conceived them has acted shamefully. For she said, "I will go after my lovers, Who give me my bread and my water, My wool and my flax, my oil and my drink." Therefore, behold, I will hedge up her way with thorns, And I will build a wall against her so that she cannot find her paths. She will pursue her lovers, but she will not overtake them; And she will seek them, but will not find them. Then she will say, "I will go back to my first husband, For it was better for me then than now!" (Hosea 2:6-9) "I will destroy her vines and fig tress, Of which she said, 'These are my wages Which my lovers have given me.' And I will make them a forest, And the beasts of the field will devour them. I will punish her for the days of the Baals When she used to offer sacrifices to them And adorn herself with her earrings and jewelry, And follow her lovers, so that she forgot Me," declares the Lord. "Therefore, behold, I will allure her, Bring her into the wilderness And speak kindly to her. Then I will give her her vineyards from there, And the valley of Achor as a door of hope. And she will sing there as in the days of her youth, As in the day when she came up from the land of Egypt. It will come about in that day," declares the Lord, "That you will call me my husband, And will no longer call me my owner. For I will remove the names of the Baals from her mouth, So that they will be mentioned by their names no more. In that day I will also make a covenant for them With the beasts of the field, The birds of the sky And the creeping things of the ground. And I will abolish the bow, the sword and war from the land, And will make them lie down in safety. I will betroth you to Me forever; Yes, I will betroth you to Me in righteousness and in justice, In lovingkindness and in compassion, And I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness. Then you will know the Lord." (Hosea 2:12-20) Then the Lord said to me, "Go again, love a woman who is loved by her husband, yet an adulteress, even as the Lord loves the sons of Israel, though they turn to other gods and love raisin cakes.  So I bought her for myself for fifteen shekels of silver and a homer and a half of barley.  (Hosea 3:1-2) Mercy speaks by Jesus’ blood hear and sing, ye sons of God justice satisfied indeed Christ has full atonement made Jesus’ blood speaks loud and sweet here all Deity can meet and, without a jarring voice welcome Zion to rejoice “all her debts were cast on me, and she must and shall go free” peace of conscience, peace with God we obtain through Jesus’ blood Jesus’ blood speaks solid rest we believe, and we are blest should the law against her roar Jesus’ blood still speaks with power “all her debts were cast on me, and she must and shall go free” --"She Must and Shall Go Free" by Derek Webb